I will have my second cycle of the new Chemo next Monday but this Thursday I will talk to the new doctor, the Radiation Oncologist. I really thought they would wait until the chemo is done before starting radiation. That is a whole new ball of ugh! Friday I go for my pre-chemo blood labs to see how my heart is doing (as this all is very hard on my heart) as well as make sure my kidney is hanging in there. Tomorrow I am getting an ultrasound and the next day I am getting an EchoCardioGram (ECG) for the heart. This week is so packed with appointments and then later this month I go for other tests but this has already become my new normal.
I play games when I can between appointments, how chemo is affecting my body and my mom's health (still undiagnosed) and my uncle's brain damage and severe stroke and memory loss and hemiplegia. It has been crazy.
On top of that I got rid of my credit cards as part of my insolvency to try to live within my means as disability cut back how much they are giving me (I mentioned that before in Feb) and it has been severely tight (I can't pay all my bills but have to play the juggling game, thus why I WAS using my CC so much). I might have to start looking for cheaper internet but chances are they won't have the high speeds I am used to currently. But it is my most expensive bill right now. I already have no TV, VoIP phone and a decade old cell phone. I don't know how they expect me to live like this to be honest... and I still do not get why how much I get from Provincial Disability dropped as soon as I started Cancer treatments. It makes no sense and I still feel that the new case worker screwed up calculations. But when you have all this going on, it is hard to confront her while balancing everything else.
In a way the hair loss wasn't as traumatizing as people make it out to be but I think perhaps that is because I have been through so much that I am more or less desensitized to changes to my appearance by now. I found out my head is not a smooth favourable shape but I could wear hats and scarves and my wig. Now that my hair is growing back I have to shave again! Oh no! lol the one thing I did
NOT miss
I had a dream a few nights ago that I put my hair up in a pony tail! That will still be awhile off but I guess my mind is ready for it
![Tongue :P](http://www.killerz.dns2go.com/smfbb20/Smileys/classic/tongue.gif)